What Your Choice of Halloween Candy Says About You
Posted on October 27, 2007
The Washington Post has examined the all-important issue of what kind of Halloween candy you give out to trick-or-treaters says about you. Steve Almond, the author of Candyfreak: A Journey Through the Chocolate Underbelly of America, provided the in-depth psychological personality type treat analysis, based on....well, we're not exactly sure what he based it on. But we totally agree with his statement in his book:
"There's something incredibly liberating about a holiday that encourages children to take candy from strangers," Almond writes of Halloween in his book. Indeed. For some reason, Almond asked that we make clear that he is a "professional candyfreak, not a therapist."
Here's a few highlights about what message you're sending to your neighbors based on the candy you hand out for Halloween:
- Three Musketeers: "Does well in groups but is somewhat pompous. Prone to fancy costumes and arcane weapons. Wears hats in public that are ill-advised."
- Almond Joy: "I'm going to put aside my aversion to coconut in praising these folks as happy-go-lucky."
- Butterfinger: "Evasive, slippery, not necessarily to be trusted."
- Candy Corn: "Purely deluded people. They don't get that candy shouldn't attempt to imitate other food groups, particularly corn."
- Reese's Peanut Butter Cups: Generous souls. "Those who understand the salty in life, as well as the sweet."
- Snickers: "Just going with the crowd, the safe candy choice, guaranteed to please the masses. Not ambitious, but dependable."
You can see the full chart with more analysis of your inner psyche, completely horrifying calorie counts and then vote on your favorite treat to hand out here. A word of advice, though: whatever you do, don't give out Twizzlers. They'll peg you as one of the "Sickos. Truly demented. Plastic people living plastic lives."
The Candyfreak book can be found on Amazon.com.